Our global village has a phrase that can be applied to missionary kids: Third Culture Kids. David C. Pollock offers this definition in Letters Never Sent, "A Third Culture Kid (TCK) is an individual who, having spent a significant part of the developmental years in a culture other than the parents' culture, develops a sense of relationship to all the cultures while not having full ownership in any."
I dedicate this page to TCKs. Missionary kids create a culture all their own. I call them "global nomads." I feature my articles, Marked for Life on this page. They are part of the Culture Shock magazine. If you are a MK, (I mean a global nomad) and would like this e-magazine, let us know at globalconnection@upci.org .
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Making Deposits and Withdrawals
from the Memory Bank
I invited some of my friends
on the Foreign Missions Administrative Committee to make a withdrawal from
the bank. It wasn't costly; just something from their memory banks. I trust
their investments will make a great deposit to my account in this issue of
Culture Shock.
Brother Lynden Shalm is our Regional Director for Asia, and one of our prized
Missionary Kids. Here he reflects on a few memories of growing up in India.
"Ellis and Marjorie Scism and their two young teenagers arrived in India
in early part of 1949 for the first time. George and Margaret Shalm arrived
about nine months later. India had only celebrated two years of independence
from England. This was a pre-PIM era. It was twenty years before the Partners
in Missions program would be introduced to Foreign Missions. As a young boy
growing up in India, I watched my mom and dad 'pray in' our support. On one
occasion, no funds arrived for three consecutive months. Mom and Dad were
driven to their knees to seek God for their basic needs in that day of utilitarianism.
Every day, we watched as the postman would come up the lane. Did he have any
food parcels today? One day he brought eight parcels that had been sent from
home. We were thrilled. One parcel had a box of Cool Aid. It turned out that
all seventy-two packages were the orange flavor! Another parcel had Christmas
gifts and someone back home evidently thought there was a girl in the family
as I got the comb and mirror set. My brothers got a big laugh out of that.
Oh well, at least I can remember what I got!
Communication was extremely limited. In this day of instant emails, text messaging,
etc., it is hard to imagine that during all the years that I lived in India
as a boy, I cannot recall any of our missionaries ever making a telephone
call.
In all our years on the field, we did not have a shower facility in the house,
so we used the old fashioned 'dipper' method.
Something I will never forget is when my mother received a letter from her
sister one day. It had taken more than two weeks to arrive in the post. When
Mom opened up the letter and read it, she sadly discovered that her sister
had written to tell her that her mom had passed away.
Looking back on growing up as a missionary kid in South India, at no time
did either my brothers or I feel that we had missed out on the good things
in life. Mom and Dad had raised us to enjoy the rich life of faith and trusting
in God."
I am always touched by the words of a Gaither song entitled "We Have
This Moment Today." I'm sure you all have it on your IPods. Smile! The
chorus says, "We have this moment to hold in our hands and to touch as
it slips through our fingers like sand; Yesterday's gone and tomorrow may
never come, But we have this moment today." The song-writer wisely advises
us to make deposits to the memory bank through the memories of the moment.
"Hold them near while they're here and don't wait for tomorrow, to look
back and wish for today." After one of our terms of service we came home
with Amy. She was about four years old. As we arrived in the airport she saw
people putting money in a machine and soft drinks falling out of the bottom.
She had NEVER seen that. She begged us for money so she could watch the drinks
fall out of the machine. Also, since we do not have hardly any people of African
descent in El Salvador, she was very astonished at seeing African-American
people in Mississippi which was our home in the states. I smile each time
I recall this. She now serves on the staff at Christian Life Center and Christian
Life College. She has gone from being a little missionary kid to a mission's
instructor.
Not all withdrawals bring smiles. Some bring pain. Living in El Salvador did
not afford us the opportunity to allow our children to work and handle some
things that a normal teenager would do in North America. So, there was a lot
of learning to do. I cannot forget when Leah, our first daughter, left for
Bible College. I was blessed to be able to go and purchase a car that a pastor
in Texas helped us get for her. Needless to say it was not a new one.
One day, when Leah had been at IBC for just a little while, she called very
upset, in fact she was crying. She needed gas. She was not accustomed to filling
her own car; no self serve in El Salvador! She wanted to write a check, and
of course the gas station would not accept it. She was confused and ended
up just going back to the dorm in frustration. Her mother and I were very
sad we could not be there to help her. We did our share of crying as well.
Now she and her husband pastor in the Los Angeles area and the preparation
of the mission field is serving her well.
My, oh my, the memories of our MKs. Now, I feel my family has grown by leaps
and bounds and with it the blessing of many precious jewels I consider "my
missionary kids." You are included!
Brother Bryan Abernathy, our Director of Promotion remembers well his missionary
kid experiences. "The one thing that I can remember was the visit from
Bro Scism and Bro Freeman to Capetown. I was thinking of coming home and not
returning to the mission field. I had been teaching in the Bible Schools in
Capetown and helping my Dad and Mom with many things in the work but the pull
of home was strong on me. Bro Scism asked me to make a sacrifice and stay
two more years to help Dad and Mom. He saw the need that I did not see. He
gave me a book called The Saffron Rope that told the story of the great sacrifice
of a man from India for the Gospel's sake. I stayed and have never regretted
it. My Dad commented to me many times of how much I helped them and the work
by staying for those two years. He made me feel like more than just a kid
who was with his missionary parents in Africa. I was an important part of
the work of God. He taught me that if I would sacrifice, God would reward
me. God has surely rewarded me many times over for such a small sacrifice.
By the way, I still have the book."
Brother Carl Varnell, our Secretary of Foreign Missions writes, "I was
asked to make a withdrawal from my memory bank to share with you. I am very
sorry but when I tried to make the withdrawal, I was informed my account had
been canceled due to lack of activity. However, I did have something small
on hand to share. To all of you who have returned to North America after living
overseas for several years please remember that your parents, family, friends
and Foreign Missions have been making deposits to your account. This means
you are very valuable to us and we believe in your future. You are now approaching
a time in life when you will begin making withdrawals from your memory bank
of life experiences. Remember to invest in others as it pays rich dividends.
We love and appreciate you all." I think that expresses the sentiments
of all of us in Foreign Missions. Invest wisely. Make withdrawals as needed.
God will use your past to bless our future.
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